Funny Friday

Funny Fridays

Men & Women's Health

Patients and Clinicians: Stop here for funny stories and quotes from the work week

Trainer sees client after long weekend

Trainer: did you get your hair highlighted over the weekend?

Client: no... those are gray hairs coming in...

(Decatur, GA 2/9/18)

PATIENT: My shoulder is killing me todAy

Therapist: well, what did you do since I saw you last?

Patient: Hmm, chopped down 4 OaK treeS, carried the logs to my truck, moved 10 bales of hay, Groomed 15 goats... i was Taking it easy

(Buffalo, Ny 2/2/18)

Talking with patient after he worked with PTA (physical therapy assistant) for first time:

Therapist: How was your time with jim on monday?

Patient: well, I figured out what the letters at the end of his name tag stand for: pain, torture, agony

(LILBURN, GA 1/19/18)

Gift exchange items:

-coffee thermos
-cocktail shaker
-chocolate covered pretzels
-giant frozen turkey (giblets included)

(lilburn, ga 12/23/17)

Client: My shoulder hurts today

Trainer: Did you do anything different recently?

Client: nothing different, just "ball slams" in my crossfit class
(Queens, NY 12/8/17)

Colleague Arrives to work late:
i thought i was going into labor, but then i realized i was just feeling the piece of cake i ate
(Norwalk, CT 11/3/17)

when referencing a poster on the wall

Student: why is there no penis on here?

Instructor: because it's a diagram of muscles and the penis isn't a muscle

student: [scoffs] you'd reconsider if you saw my husband's

(Manhattan, NY 12/15/17)

when concluding a grade school Health class

Teacher: so class, can someone get pregnant while having sex in the shower?

Student: no, but you have to 'double bag it' to be safe

Teacher: actually, You can in fact get pregnant and you should always wear only one condom

Student: [dramatic pause]... can I go make a phone call, please!?
(Manhattan, NY 12/1/17)

when referring to hamstrings:
My 'pork' strings are killing me today!
(Missoula, MT 11/10/17)

My orthopedist said I am going to have to have shoulder surgery because I tore my labia
(queens, NY 10/27/17)

Female Patient:
I feel like I have to pee all the time. But what can I say, I was cursed with my father's prostate
(West Islip, ny 10/20/17)

Therapist: So, did you have fun with the new activities last time?

Patient: Yeah, the most fun part was going home
(New Canaan, CT 11/24/17)

The only time my shoulder doesn't hurt is when I'm erect
(New Cannan, CT 10/12/17)

RSS Feed

Funny Fridays

Men & Women's Health

Submit Your Quote or Story!